And when you don't do it, it just feels as if your out of rhythm?

For example for me is that recently my church was training for a soccer competition, n every thursday we'd train for about 2hrs from 7:30. And since that comp was held just recently, we'd stop training and hence therefore i was outta routine.

But there was another add on to this routine for me. Since every thursday i would go, i would visit Rose after school and walk her home after her intuition. But since it's stopped i haven't been able to have an excuse to go see her.

I miss Rose more and more now. Since i've been so pov to the point where i can't even pay for transport. I miss holding her hand. I miss hugging her just whenever i can. I miss walking her home. I miss just being around her. N now it seems like she has to make the effort for us to see each other...... which totally sucks...

But the thing about this is i cant really do anything about it... Like until i find a job i can't physically do anything about seeing her. I mean yeh there is always the option of walking there. Which one day i will... but until its totally necessary i wont even consider this.

Anyways now i've gotten into the habit of just talking to her photo and just saying silly little things like "you're soooo amazing", "you're soooo beautiful", "you're just too good for me" and "just the inspiration i need", and more.... and always getting looks from my friends around.

But now days, since i don't get to see her much, i'm quite content on just hearing her voice, even if it means ringing her and just listening to her cute voice mail, "harlo, this is avi, i can't.....' its quite the formal voice mail. Nyways well it's sorta become routine just ringing her to say goodnight. Cos i know that i can always hear her voice at the softest and just really hear her fall tired and go sleep. I ono if its just me but like i love the fact that i'm the last thing she hears before she heads to lalaland. It comforts me that i can tell her that she's important to me and really just sorta calm her to sleep.

Her beauty just amazes me everytime, I just wanna tell the world about her. N yet i wanna keep this beauty to myself... i know im weird that way...

anyways this is my lil rant abt just my rose.

❤rose.