I haven't been so upset in awhile.
my ducts are about to burst, into drops of salty liquid.
But like srsly how can so many things go wrong in 1 day?
THE FUCK?!

i havent blogged so much in 1 nite...
or day or watever.
but like

Firstly the whole carl thing, n now my own mother.
i believe that i have a massive sign on my head saying
"this kid is a FUCKING DOUCHE!"

i cant explain y things like this happen to me, but really y the fuck am ithe one who is always been hated on?
did i do something to offend every fucking person on this dam world?

i thought i wouldnt let this get to me but
now its hurrts bad!
the fuck she think she is? BOTH OF THEM?
its bad enuf i have 1 of them but both?
so good for be there wen im down, so good for empty promises.
but its ok if u need me to support u down? cos u kno im not gonna let anything happen.
FUCK U!
SRSLY! i dont mind being used, but to be trampled and shoved into the depths.
srsly.
SRSLY!!!!!!!


FML!!!!!!

then wen i saw juju, its like im not even existant to her life.
we see each otha mayb once, if lucky twice a week. n she wants to do is apply herself in rumination? n just think past abt her own paramore?
n only wen i give an invitation, will she respond, half the time.
i suppose me myself am INVISIBLE!

N FINALLY my own progenitor, srsly.
the pundit, she has to even create this artificial love she propose that she cares?
FUCK OFF! srsly, to care for me only now, n give half a rats ass abt me b4 dat.?
the hell u think u r?

this is my rant
n i dont give a shit anymore.
cos im will be the better person
fml!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i dont mean to offend usually. but sometimes it just gets to u kno?
like i mean yeh yeh say wat u wanna abt me. but it does hurt.
but that y im gonna let this out through blog.

i find it funny how some ppl can be intolerant to the fact that they are hippacrips themselves.
its one thing to say things abt other ppl, in an offensiver manner but for them to then ask the other people who are doing the same to not do,, it but its ok for u to do so?
wow such great ethics.
are we born to reject our values for the profanity which is being a bitch?

secondly i dont care if u are gonna say something abt me, really and if i kno u r gonna say something abt me, then say it in front of me.
r u scared that ur gonna tell the story in a twisted way?
mayb ur scared the fact ur gonna hurt my feelings even though u damn know u r?
or mayb even the fact that ur saying shit that u "feel" its private, but ur telling other people?
so private?!
i dont feel that we share the same views, but doesnt mean that im gonna oppose u at every point, this is y we are friends, or were, watever u think.
Even by now, being curtious, u would keep ur self outta others problems.this is just common manners n sometimes its hard i kno, but really some self control would help.
I mean yeh now ur involved, but whos fault is it that they are involved?
n finally, accept. well i dont care wat my former paramore feels abt the fact things will neva ever gonna go according to ur will, but the point is that sometimes, u need to live n let go. most ppl have y cant u?

im sorry ur fcuked up in the head.

o well.
u ruined my day. but meh i aint gonna give a crap abt this, cos u kno wat,
im the better man.

=]
gonna see juju soon.

even though i only had a 3 period day, im soooooooo glad its now ova.
i found out that i have an english assesment tomorow.
farout y couldnt past kenny done it earlier...
sry no UBF tonite....
lol


i couldnt stop thinkin abt her last nite... n even tonite.
i hope shes ok.
i guess we decieve ourselves so much that we dont realise that life is gettin the better of us.
wat ever the problem is, even if its me..... i hope she rests well n is able to let it go.
i dont kno wat went wrong, n probs none of my business, but it did seem as if she ignored me on the weekend.
n now since im here alone i cant help but to think she is in pain. hope shes alrite.

i found out that mez was reading dis last nite. 1 of the few ppl who actually read this...
so proud lol
but mez if ur reading dis, then i propose u shld get hints along some of the past posts n i think u'll get it, if u dont just come ask me. cos then i kno i can rely on u, since ur probs one of the people who kno me best.

anyways almost 2weeks.*hint malinda* n i dont mean trials.
lol got to see her this weekend. even though hiding from every1 lol
shes a good actor, where as im just bad.
lol
anyways excited. she mite be able to come out sometime this week.
need something good.
ANYWAYS HOME TIME! hour n half ride...
fun rite?!



emma watson & kaya scodelario
HOT!!!

Emma Watson & Kaya Scodelario at Gourmet Burger Kitchen (May 2009 in Hampstead)

CAMP! was freakin awesome!!!! srsly!
i mean my expectations was completely exceeded wat i thought it was gonna be like.
the stars were never brighter. had awesome talks 1on1 with so many ppl,
n i finally realised that i wanna live for GOD. n not only that i wanna strive to be something more!
tonite i will can say that i am christian. truly!

but on a worse note.
mum thinks ima good for nothing criminal.
coming home at 10:30.....
wth?

n now she wants me to change high skools.
WITH NOT EVEN 2 MNTHS LEFT?!
my gosh....

wat do i say in response....
i made some stupid decisions on my part i agree.
but really....
does she have to do that?!

almost a week. well its technically a week tomorow nite. but hey its been a good week so far.
no hiccups, no bumps.
hehe. i skipped a beat. ;D
kenny is now done search cos the search has come to a stop for now.
feel good for me, will ya?
bear wif me, ill tell u wen its the rite time. but i am now taken.
=] but shhhh abt it!

i feel good but bad abt this.
i did something wrong. AGAIN!
fcuk. like the one thing i did wif no.6 long time ago, happened again. but this time its worse
its with the moomoo. n worse shes devoted, wat did i do! i didnt mean to steal her innocence.
o gosh. i wanted to say sry sincerely, but she actually sorta enjoyed it.
i wont admit i didnt but i regret doing it.!
dw i didnt do something really bad.
just bad for me!

i feel bad. i got my letter, as usual, but i feel like im decieving her.
its not that i dont want her to kno, but wen shes that important to u
its different rite?
her questions focusing on the theme "love". fcuk. wat did i get myself into.
or mayb im just ova doing it as usual.
carl is still angry at me. on friday nite she didnt even try talk to me.
hugged the person nxt to me, but jealously kills a man.
o wells. she'll get ova this eventually.

i rmeber reading that she didnt like singled minded ppl. fcuk. such a hypocrite.


im hooked on the song breakeven as most of u kno...
but its sorta tru. some1 will hurt rite?
but i suppose we must be truly strong.

omgsh searching for pics tonite. i found this pic,
every1 knows that im in love with effy from skins, but check out EMMA WATSON!
FCUK. STUNNING!





whos who?!
i kno rite ...
but moomoo kiked all there asses easy!

hahaha rite now im in the food court of towers, because mum is at home n i dont wanna go bak to her place...
n really its quite sad...
fones dead, no internet at home so leeching off free maccas wifi.....
n also trying to organise something that just aint gonna happen. i kno rite recipe for diaster!

im in a happy moood tonite though. though running away from mum, i saw fds tonite n just had a good nite all together..

i saw juju tonite. no not julina, but my liljuju
haha its been 3 days. cloud 9 here i come!

today the sun shines, even through the grey clouds.
day2. today's potential is slowly showing itself.

i fore see some very wierd things will happen soon.
FCUK.

its dt rite now....
sammy was by my side but she gone now.
n today im sitting here thinkin.
BBBBBBBBBRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

i scream.
u scream.
we all scream.

the fact that we can exist together is insanity.

today. my dearest of friends, we concluded that today was a day to forget.
so many things went wrong.
so many things could of been better but hey wat am i complaining abt?

i realised today is..... IM ONE FUCKING LONELY KID!

fds rite?
i wanted to sit nxt to lenny n nads today.... but
im afraid lenny mite have a spaz at me. n plus i realised a fd like me is way outta her league.
so good for best fds rite?

so i sat alone. with my bag n a box.
wats the box for u ask?

well i long promised cho to get her a box for our 365.
long story short.
me, my bag, a box and some kfc.
a recipe for complete nigelism.

n top that off i saw JKI, not once or twice today, but FUCKING 6 TIMES!!!! 3 of them avoiding my eyes.
do i have a sign on me that says that im a fucking douche?
am i destined to be part of this one man sindicate.

the real question is
WHEN AM I GONNA JUST LET GO>!

todays potential has just lost itself.
the reality of my situation is
kenny needs to go home.

skins. its so good its bad for u. <3




ck.

I've been thinking since saturday..
I'm a man defined by my moments. No matter where, but depending this moment can change my course like train tracks that divide my network.

Ever feel something is so natural? It just feels rite?
my trip down this track, really settle my heart finally. Momo. this name will ring like a serenade of an angel until i see her later this week! ever yern? for her? thats my lyf 24/7.

Friday. Saturday. Sunday.
my weekend. Was Fantastic.

Except. the break that can't be moved.
i realised that im neva gonna be ova wat she did.

i saw JIK on friday. Hot as always. i would dare say smokin but truth is...
im falling to pieces. Wat am i suppose to do? when u kno that she is ok? abt the fact she wont ever tell me y?
my curiosity srsly is abt to kill another cat.


Yummy sent me another letter on saturday! im not over her.
i dont think ill ever be but i think this an obstacle that i must cross! but the question is.........
how long will that take?
She is doing well. More better than ive ever heard.
BF2. he is doing her good.
JEALOUSY i think....
FUCK ME!!!

i get the lyrics to the script too well....

"What am i supposed to do when the best part of me, was always you.
What am i suppoe to say when, I'm all choked up that your ok.
I'm falling to pieces"

i wanna say that i guess u aint the best part, but an important part.
but my best part will be u. whoever u is im not sure yet.
but who knows.

i wanna say this. I've changed but its too late.
hey wats DAT!

Its been quite a while since the last time ive been blogging.
I remeber the first time i set up this blog , i thought to myself ill be bloggin everyday but in reality now im even procastinating about bloging...
i mean this is my portal to my say but i hardly ever use it.....

sry guys.

anyways been such a good weekend and week sooo far!
LYF IS B E A U TTTIIIIFFFUUUULLLLLLLLLL!

lol had my bday ova the weekend n soo i wanna just say thx guys!!!!!!
love u all heaps!
anyways wen i get some vids n pcis from fds
ill post abt my bday n also JAY CHOU's concert!
bloddy good!

anyways ill catchas on the flip side!